Utterly Confused

(C) educational-alternatives.net
(C) educational-alternatives.net Just what the heck is going on?

Never a dull day where you don’t learn anything new.
Today the female friend I thought I had may have just become something much more.
And the female friend I wanted seems to be not a friend at all.
I want what she has with the other guy, but I can’t compete and so I withdrew
But as it turns out, the other guy, may have a thing for guys, one of the few
So dear reader, I’m as confused as you are, I’m facing the stuffs of good drama lore.

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Utterly Confused

A Prompt that Went Entirely Awry

Present-day you meets 10-years-ago you for coffee.

Share with your younger self the most challenging thing, the most rewarding thing, and the most fun thing they have to look forward to.

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/dp_prompt/good-tidings/

I wouldn’t have a single nice thing to say to nine-year-old me. I will probably start out the conversation by telling him my current accomplishments and the situations I am now in. Then proceed to tell him the hell he is going to walk through in the next ten years to get to where I am. Call me mean, and brutally honest, but I call it tough love.

Perhaps I don’t want to spoil the surprises, however unpleasant, but I will warn him of the many things he will discover about life and how harsh it can be. Reflecting back on the past ten years, I realize there really is nothing to be grateful, or thankful, or optimistic about. Life just sucks. It’s a cycle of stress, disappointment, anger, hatred and irritation, which all culminates in death.

I feel like another walking contradiction. I feel proud of what I have accomplished and where I am, but if I were to be given another chance to do it, I don’t want to be where I am right now. I rather have my fun, take my risks, and lose it all. But then again I wonder if ten-years-in-the-future-me will reprimand me for doing so. Is fun and thrill worth it?

I guess I will never know, because I have never taken that road, and I cannot form an accurate comparison. My life is all about the regrets on the other path that I did not walk. Then again, I am proud of where I am now, thus I can’t really call them regrets, can I? Let’s call them objects of curiosity instead then. That’s much more accurate. How do you overcome this curiosity of wondering what would have happened if you walked the other path?

You can’t advise me to focus on the present, because I will always be curious. You can’t tell me to be grateful for what I have now, because I am not. The grass is always greener on the other side, in theory, and my imagination is a powerful thing. I always perceive the path I have not walked to be so much more rewarding.

If I am still being confusing, let’s phrase it this way. One path leads to safety and security. You are well-to-do, decently satisfied and achieved the minimum of what leads to a financially successful life. The other path leads to risk and adventure and thrill. You are exposed to strange things, experienced a great number of things, and perhaps have one great artistic talent, like singing, drawing, dancing or playing instruments. The future is very uncertain, though.

Oh, I just thought of a different way to phrase it which is much simpler. Comfort zone. Doh, why didn’t I think of that earlier!

I feel like I’m digressing so I’ll wrap it up here with a curious query: How do you dare to wander out of your comfort zone if you have so much to lose?

A Prompt that Went Entirely Awry

#Writing101 The Burger Man

Today’s Prompt: Who’s the most interesting person (or people) you’ve met this year?

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What on earth am I supposed to write about? This is a ridiculous topic! Even more ridiculous than the music one! The year has barely begun; it’s only April for god’s sake! And I haven’t left the confines of my home since December so the number of people I’ve met is literally zero. I am not exaggerating.

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Today’s twist: Turn your post into a character study.

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And what on earth is a character study!?


Anyway, I just had a thought on how to answer the prompt. (I actually had two thoughts. My initial plan was to write about meeting myself, but that would come across as obnoxious and self-absorbed, so I chose plan B.)

The most interesting person I met this year is this malay bloke who sold burgers to me.

As I placed my order, I told him I wanted ketchup instead of chilli.

And he asked back, thick or dilute?

And five minutes later, I sunk my teeth into, questionably, the best burger in the world

Credits: khirulazmil.blogspot.com
feast your eyes on this baby

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Character Study:

A person who makes burgers for a living can either be A) very committed or B) stuck with a dead end job. I’d like to go with option A. His commitment to burger-selling is most probably attributed to his childhood, where he experienced a traumatizing incident whereby a burger probably saved his life. This could happen in a number of ways: I like to imagine that burgers came to life and played with him at night and kept him company. If you find my thesis nonsense, then feel free to go with option B instead.

How’s that for a character study?

#Writing101 The Burger Man

My first date…?

A few years back, I recall myself agreeing to go out with a complete stranger. I did not think it was a foolish decision then, nor do I now. I am convinced that he is just an ordinary person like myself, and I have reliable sources. Unless, he created an entire network of social media to fake an identity. If he did go to that extent, then I suspect he’s a secret agent of some sort and I would go out with him anyway. I may be like some sort of new potential that he’s looking to recruit.

Anyway, we did go out to Bugis, a city in the middle-to-higher end of Singapore.  Back then I wasn’t an adventurous kid, and I didn’t have friends or family who I could go out with. Thus it was the first time I had been to Bugis. (Yeah that stranger stole my virgin Bugis experience!) Long story short, it was an ordinary trip, with much awkward conversation. He actually invited another dude that he also met online to join us. Wait, I didn’t mention how we met? Ok let’s pause-

We met on the Internet,  through Facebook probably. He was rather direct and persisted on keeping in touch. My senses yelled, “Stranger Danger!” but the nice part of me knew replying was polite. Also, I secretly hoped he was CIA. That came into play too. one day, after several days of acquaintance, he invited me out. I rejected him several times before finally deciding to reward his persistence. —
And that brings us to the present! Wow, that’s long. Oh by the way, he was only few years older than me. A malaysian as well. Now, play

So, CIA and me had lunch at a restaurant I’ve never been to. He insisted to pay. Then he treated me to a run on every machine in the arcade. Then Recruit #2 joined us for dinner at another restaurant I’ve never been.
And then we never met or talked again. Ho and I gots to know that he found Recruit #2 the same way he met me.
How odd, don’t you agree? In retrospect, I felt like I was being used as a ‘lunch-cum-dinner one night stand date’, sort of.
It has been at least 4 years since that incident, and this is the first time I’m recalling it. But wow, that has to be one of my weirdest experience ever.

I wonder if he’s met Recruit #281616278383 now…?

My first date…?

I am a Teenager

The problem with being a teenager.. is the ambiguity of it.

I ask you, can you define a teenager?

You would reply, someone around 18 years old.

Then what exactly does that mean? It doesn’t mean much would it?

People define adults as individuals who are able to think maturely and make correct decisions, by theory anyway.

Children are young and therefore may make wrong decisions. How many times have we seen a toddler do something wrong and people brush it off with “He’s just a child. He doesn’t know right from wrong.”

What about teenagers?

Teenagers… well… we call them young adults. Adults, in the sense that they are supposed to know how to make the right decisions. But young, suggests that they still don’t know right from wrong.

Now, I am a teenager. And when I make my decisions, I make it in the interest of myself. I know right from wrong, so my decisions aren’t amoral or against the law. But after I decide something, my parents would come along and yell.

“Fred! You’re supposed to consult us before you do anything! We are your parents!”

So I learn. And the next time I make a decision, I would delay and reply, “Let me ask my parents first.”

Then I get yelled at again.

“Fred! You’re eighteen! Almost an adult! Can’t you make decisions by yourself?!”

So now, I just sit and play dumb like a rock.

When people ask me anything, I reply “hmm.”

I am a Teenager